Can you hear me? Texting Rules.

My two year old can navigate my iphone better than I.  My 9 month old has already deleted programs off of it.

This, however, is not a post about letting your kids use your devices, we can discuss that all day.  It is a post about using media and devices more and more in our lives and trying not to lose the ability to communicate well and effectively in interpersonal relationships.

Until you can express sarcasm, anger, or the difference between a corner of your mouth smile and a light up your face sparkling smile, texting and emails will never truly be able to be the medium of choice to express yourself in important personal contact.

And it's getting worse.

Did you send a text message today? An email? It's quite likely you did.  How many of those missives involved important content?  Setting a date?  Discussing a topic of contention?  Expressing how much you miss someone?

Aside from sending a birthday card, when was the last time you sent a letter?  Or, for that matter, received one?  It's great when you do, right?  Perhaps there was a period back in the 90's when letter writing included  typing on a word processor, but that didn't last long... people preferred the written word.

Today,  the number of land lines decreases each day.  Do you know someone who doesn't have a cell phone?  Even the last hold outs are being pressured into at least a "pay-as-you-go" option.

Sure, the convenience is wonderful...for some things.  "OMW" to tell someone you're meeting you'll be right there, or helping find someone in a crowd, or texting in a  situation where silence is suggested are just quick easy examples.

Honestly, I'm worried that a generation born into this electronic world will have trouble with face to face communications.  Will they be able to have a conversation that doesn't involve a device?  Will they be able to interview?  Will they be able to entertain themselves when all the power runs out?

Who knows.  But I do know, there needs to be a cell phone etiquette

Perhaps, a new set of rules for talking and texting... here is my suggestion:

Rules for use of Cell Phones/Texting

1.  If you're in a quiet place, and you must talk on your phone, do it at the same volume you would talk to a person sitting next to you - if they can't hear you, step outside or call back later.

2.   If you're having a conversation with someone, do not text someone else.  Look at that person in their eyes.  

3.  If you get a text while talking to someone, excuse yourself to look at your phone (if you must) don't just look at it without acknowledging you are doing it.

4. Never accept a call or look/send a text while in a live theater performance (it should be silent anyway).  Never talk on your phone in a movie theater.

5.  If you are asking someone out, call them.  

6.  Reply to a phone call with a phone call, not an email or text.

7. Don't text/email/post anything you wouldn't say in person, out loud.

8.  Use your headphones when listening to music or a noisy game.

9. Don't text and walk.

*10. Don't text and drive.

(feel free to add to this list, I'll update it...) 

 Reader additions:
  
11. Never text a question that requires a detailed answer. If you need advice call so there can be a discussion. (Lauren)

Call me old fashioned, or behind the times, or late for dinner, but I really do worry about this.

Do you?

Being a mom is my job. BONUS: Chocolate/toffee covered Matzo

It's amazing how many things come between me and writing my blog;  kids, naptime, trips to the Dr., dead computers, dead cameras, down internet, laziness, frogs, boils, and pestilence...to name a few.

Having the time to do things I want doesn't seem to be in the cards, any deal, any day, any game.  Perhaps it's because I'm really not playing.  I bet if put my mind to it I could accomplish so much in a day.

When I was working, I commuted an hour each way, worked 8-10 hours, and still managed to make a nice dinner, get some laundry done, do some cleaning, watch a TV show, have some quality time with my husband, and if I were motivated, a small work-out.  Then, after all that, I'd get at least 6 hours of sleep.

How did I do it?

On a good day I put fresh clothes on, get the kids in fresh clothes and out of PJ's, feed everyone breakfast, do a bit of straightening, put a load of clothes up in the washer and head out to the park.  All before 9:30am.

On a bad day, everyone stays in PJ's all day, food is served as needed, no one goes to the park, and I sit, when I can, on the couch watching as the house gets taken apart one board book at a time.  I complain that Big D has too much energy, and put him in timeout for doing things he should be doing outside.  I feed Little D jarred baby food and don't prepare anything fresh for the week ahead.

There has got to be a better way.

How about I give myself an allowance for doing things I should do... yeah, that's it, whenever I get dressed I get $5, if I go to the park, another $5.  If I make babyfood, I get $10.  You know, like...wait....dare I say it: like a job!!

Sure, sure, who's going to pay me?  Me?  My husband?  How about some government program somewhere that pays mothers for being good mothers instead of paying someone else to watch bad mothers' kids.  That makes sense, right?  I'm raising the future of America!

Thinking about it like that makes me think that perhaps just being a good mom without getting paid is my job.  I'm supposed to be active, I'm supposed to keep my kids engaged and active.  Getting dressed, making healthy foods, keeping the house clean, are just a few of the things that are in the job description.  I knew that when I accepted this job, but lost sight of it somewhere down the road.

I've been looking for external motivation and, not surprisingly, didn't find any.

I have to do this myself.

I can be the best mother I can be.

I can get my sorry, saggy, saddlebags back in shape.

I can...damn, I just made chocolate and toffee covered matzo for Passover, no more room in the fridge for a week.  I'll start then.

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To make up for a couple of weeks of no posts, the Messes of the Day are brought to you by:

Iams Cat Food:

Crayola / Bic

And the Recipe of the Day:  Chocolate and toffee covered Matzo

Ingredients:
-1 Box of Matzo ( I like the lightly salted ones)
-2 sticks (1/2 lb) butter (I like salted, but it's up to you and your blood pressure)
-1 Cup Brown Sugar
-1 Bag (8oz maybe) chocolate chips ( I like milk choco. but I bet dark would be good, too)
-Nuts as desired (I like some boys, some girls..you know...some with nuts, others without)

How to:
-Cover baking sheets entirely with foil (it gets messy)
-Lay out matzos breaking as necessary to cover entire area
-Over a medium flame boil butter and sugar until melted then an additional 2-3 minutes, until it coats spoon
(Careful , that sh*t is HOT!)
-Brush caramel as evenly as possible over all maztos ( I find this amount makes three trays worth)
-Bake in 325 degree oven for 10-12 minutes until bubbly
-Carefully remove from oven and place on flat heat proof space.
-Sprinkle generously with chips
-Wait 2 minutes or so, and with the back of a turner (spatula) spread the now melted chips
-if desired, sprinkle a pinch of sea salt on top lightly
-if desired, cover with chopped nuts ( above I used walnuts)
-while still warm, use large knife ( I used my cleaver) to score and cut into bite sized pieces.
-put in fridge to harden
-Deeelicious...and you don't have to celebrate Passover to love them either!


UPDATE:

A reader suggested she do this with Pretzels !!! Genius!  To do this, instead of brushing the pretzels, dip them.   Then, once baked, dip them in pre-melted chocolate (use double boiler method if you can.) lay on parchment paper in fridge - oh, I can hardly wait to try this!!!!

2Y92D: Loading...Loading...Loading...

My children are 100% apart of the digital era.

At two, he can navigate both my phone and my kindle better than I.  He may not know what he's doing, but he can surely find what he's looking for in the games videos, Netflix, or sadly, Youtube.

A shameless plug for my favorite program for Android devices is Kids Place I can choose which games or apps he is allowed to have access to and he cannot watch or play anything else. Also, it does not allow any in app purchasing.  For my Kindle Fire, it's invaluable (and free!)

I'm guilty here, when times get rough and I have run out of steam, I encourage the watching of videos.  I'd rather him watch the nasty purple dinosaur than tear apart his room again looking for one specific car.  I'd rather him watch those annoying twin babies who talk to each other than climb on the table...again.

I feel badly about it, but I perpetuate the behavior and I'm 60% okay with it.

Odds are against my kids that they will ever use a manual typewriter, a rotary phone, or have to turn a dial to change the channels on the black and white TV.  However, since both my husband and I are closely entwined with the theatre world he just might see or be able to use one of the above if it is needed as a prop in a show.

With all digital media, there is a period where content is "loading."  Each day and into the future, the amount of "loading" time will undoubtedly decrease. For now, the "loading" bar is present in his everyday life.

This brings me to the point of today's post.  Daniel equates "loading" with "waiting patiently."

My husband leaves the house pretty early in the morning most days, and has a sweet verbal exchange with Big D.  Just recently that ritual no longer includes tears, thankfully.

"Bu-bye, see you soon!!" Daddy says to Daniel.
"Bu-bye, see you soon!" Daniel says to Daddy.
"Bu-bye, see you soon!!" Daddy says to Daniel.
"Bu-bye, see you soon!" Daniel says to Daddy.
They exchange kisses and Daddy leaves.

Daniel runs to the living room window, steps up on his stool, looks out the window and knocks on the glass.  They exchange waves. and another round of  "bubye's"

Today, Brian took the trash out back to the bins.  It took a little longer for him to show up in front of the house.

While standing on his stool looking out the window, Daniel was repeating over and over:
"Loading....Loading Daddy....Loading...Daddy"

That is a perfect example of children born in this age, ( with parents who allow it, of course). If you can find a better one, (without giving me a hard time about letting my kids use these devices) I'd love to hear it.