In 5 minutes.

What can you do in 5 minutes?

Think about it.  Does it take you longer to use the bathroom? Take a shower? Get dressed? Prepare lunch?

This is what my son did in 5 minutes, today:

In 5 minutes, my son got into the stash of Christmas and Hanukkah presents and start opening everything.  Thankfully, he was so proud that he found a driedel,  he stopped what he was doing and came out of his room.  After disappearing for another 2 minutes, he came back with the packing material for the large box of Amazon presents.  Thankfully, he thinks that poppers are fun in and of themselves and likes to pop the in front of me.

In the next few minutes that it took me to move all the presents from their prior location to a new, out of reach location, my son took the entire tube of toothpaste and smeared it all over his room.  I came back into him room to discuss not opening presents, when I smelled an overwhelming scent of mint.

 Toothpaste.

"Daaaaaniel!" I saw it on the walls first.  Dripping light blue slime trails with silver sparkles.

"Daaaniel?" He pointed to the window sill.  There in the sunlight was a silver dollar size blob of the. same, with a thin line that began to drip down the wall behind his bed.

I found it on a sock.

I found toothpaste footprints on the carpet.

And I found it on his comforter.  I'll get the chunks, but that, he'll have to live with until the next time I have to clean it for a more serious, natural based mess.

5 minutes.  Today.

It took longer than that to clean it up.
It took longer than that to write this.

No More Patience

Before you have kids, it's easy to say "No Problem, I could handle that!"

When you're working off of a max of 4 hours of sleep at a time for over a year, money is tight, and your kids are 2 and under, the "No Problem, I can handle that" turns into "Which problem do I address, and which battle do I choose not to fight."

That's right ladies and gents, I don't fight every battle.  I don't have the strength or the patience to deal with the consequences.  Let's face it, trying to get a 2 year old to do what you what, when you want, is harder for you than it is for him.

It seems I have to set certain hard rules - these rules must be followed.  Everything else is... TBD.

3 Rules that can't be broken:

1. We are gentle with our sister

2. No climbing on the table/furniture or windowsills

3. No hitting.

Anything outside of that seems manageable...

...until it isn't.

And when it isn't, nothing goes well.  I cry over spilled milk, yell when he head butts her again, put him in time out every 10 minutes, and get irritated at everything...EVERYTHING.  My husband can't come home soon enough, bed time  is 2 years away, and dinner time is like feeding time at the zoo, only, I can't hose them down when there is food everywhere.

How do you do it?  How do you keep a smile on your face when things just get so damn frustrating?

How do you put up with all the changes of voice in this post?

Not often enough, I get that mommy motivation I think I should have all the time.  I keep the TV off most of the day, I'm on the floor playing and teaching the kids, I make all meals from scratch for the kids and for my husband, the laundry is going, the dishes are clean, and, when I'm not doing any of that, I'm cleaning.  Also, I'm happy to do it - to do all of it.

On every other day, I'm amazed at those moms who seem they can do it all... with more kids even.  On those days I wish I had a stronger attachment to a religion - I can't tell you the number of moms and non-moms who advise prayer.  I'm glad it works for them, envious almost.  Truly, when things get rough, a faith in something more powerful than themselves must give some soothing help.  I don't really have that - perhaps that's what I'm missing.  Maybe I need anti-depressants.  Maybe I just need to get out and go to the gym everyday and get that adrenaline rush to keep going.

Likely I need more sleep, more exercise,  and more patience.

Seriously, aside from needing grammar lessons, who doesn't need more patience?